Cubias, Juliana CA: Born to Wrestle
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By Bill X. Barron, RMN Events Writer
In the life of any young person, there lives a life wrestling to be born. Then there are those who are born to wrestle. For 17-year old Juliana Cubias of Laguna Niguel, California, wrestling has become the metaphor through which her life – literally without a place to call home – has found its calling.
Finding herself with a family she had never known she had – two caring parents and three younger siblings – while at the same time having to separate from her mother’s self-imposed circumstances, Juliana describes her perspective in 2014-15 as “lost” while everyone around her was involved in something meaningful.
Her Aunt Noemi Marsh, now legal guardian along with her husband Nick, relates: “In many ways, Juliana has always been part of the family. When her mother, my sister Norma, was in rehab for drug-related issues, ‘J’ first lived with us from age 3 to 5, where she bonded with my son Luke.
“She called me ‘Nina,’ Spanish for godmother. With my sister in and out of treatment, at times both lived with us or with our mother in California. By 7th grade, Juliana had been in eleven different schools.
“When, at age 12, we learned that she and Norma were homeless on the streets, we made the decision to move from Illinois. Her mom essentially disappeared, so we eventually decided to assume legal guardianship. That’s when I insisted that Juliana had to join a sport or school activity.”
As her adopted father Nick relates: “The beginning was a learning process for her and us, as we had to earn her trust. In her very first year of wrestling (and high school), she not only did well, but also developed a love for the sport, engulfing everything she now is.”
Since changing schools her sophomore year to compete for Aliso Niguel High, where her uncle Eric Marsh coaches, Juliana has finished 2nd and 5th at Sectionals, has twice qualified for the California Girls State Championship, and has been named OCWCA League Wrestler of the Year two times.
Juliana declares: “I needed an outlet. My freshman year, around other girls interested in wrestling, we experienced everything together, all as one team. They were welcoming, loving. I felt at home. I have never felt anything as tough as wrestling, and I know it has shaped me into the person I am today.”
Now the returning varsity captain, Juliana became Aliso Niguel High School’s first wrestler – male or female – to ever place at State when she garnered an 8th-place medal in the girls’ championship.
As proud Nick describes: “Now in her senior year, wrestling has become her identity. It has totally encompassed every aspect of her life, turning her into a strong, dedicated, determined, Jesus and family-loving wrestler.”
Missing for much of her seventeen years, Juliana now experiences the security which comes from both putting her trust in others and, more importantly, learning to trust and believe in herself.
Wrestling for Juliana has become family. It has helped her learn to allow others into her life, knowing both at home and on the team that these people – unlike her mother – would never again leave her alone.
“Wrestling is all about trust – putting other troubles aside – trusting the move that the coach asks you to do is right, trusting others to be in my corner to push me to my limit, knowing my teammates are
there win or lose, and valuing family who are there in the stands cheering me on regardless of the result.”
Juliana’s freshman high school coach, Jesse Jaime of San Demas, knew that “wrestling is the toughest sport physically, mentally, and emotionally,” characterizes Noemi. “He told her that there would be no try-outs; if you can hang, you can stay. J responded to the challenge.
“Right away, I could see her focus become clear. I saw the potential – and the fire – that I knew was there all along.” Juliana now holds in her hands a long-term prospective outlook on a life she has yet to know.
“I look forward to this senior season; together with six other seniors, we will push through everything together. We will take long bus rides, screaming out all the song lyrics. After high school, I am excited to see what college I get into, and after competing in college, I will return to coach Aliso Niguel.”
As one family, Noemi, Nick and Juliana experienced RMN Events for the first time at the 2019 Freak Show. “Just amazing, such caliber of girl wrestlers, with all their families there to support them,” proclaims Noemi.
“Everyone there was all in; the Freak Show flowed so well. We saw how much the level of competition pushed Juliana to do her best. We saw her renewed determination, with a new mindset to mentally prepare for the next match.”
Trust in oneself also meant, for Juliana, that she not only had to value letting herself go, but also to give herself permission to go one hundred percent. “I did not know 100% until the Freak Show. I won my first match, then had to battle back through the consolation bracket, a total of 12 matches in two days.”
“Even though I was exhausted, it was the most fun I have had in a tournament because I had to fight to the end. My body was so tired, I just wanted to go home. But in the end, I had no regrets. I fought my best. Even when I lost by points, it was after 3 full periods. I never gave up.”
If you hold back, there is always the excuse that you didn’t try your hardest. Perhaps Juliana’s most important lesson, applicable on and off the mat, was that she learned that she could trust herself to give her all, then just as importantly to believe enough in her innate resilience to own the final result.
For most everyone, but especially for Juliana, she feels she “could not have done this by myself. My coaches, especially Richie Trevino at Aliso Niguel, get me through everything. Coach Trevino said it was the best day of his life when I transferred there my sophomore year!”
“Inside the wrestling room, it’s all about wrestling. Richie always encourages me to do my best. He helps me fix my mistakes; he knows my moves better than I know them!” Coach T also understands there’s a place for balance: “he reminds me to have fun outside the room.”
In a life in need of balance, Juliana has learned to accept and value having parents who are always there for her. Now, instead of pushing away help, she welcomes their partnership. “I would not be in wrestling if it were not for them. My parents believe in me. Even when I lose, they pick me up.”
Wrestling has opened Juliana, breaking through street-reinforced walls of isolation, enabling her to “openly express her fears and doubts, as well as overcome moments where she would freeze up,” espouses Noemi.
“She needed to know that people would not give up on her before she could learn not to give up on herself. Wrestling’s such an awesome sport! I didn’t realize how much she would come to love it!” exclaims Noemi.
Juliana has transformed her personality from “lost, frustrated, and withdrawn” to “happy, focused, and excited.” Through it all, Juliana now knows that she “can do it” on the mat and with her life.”
Nick and Noemi credit their faith in God for helping all of them “find a path and a purpose. Through God’s passion, we have managed to stay together as one family. He has grounded us with a sense of purpose. We live knowing that God has gotten us there.”
Likewise, wrestling has embraced Juliana, helping her to “gain faith in herself and trust in others.” Noemi knows these trials have shaped Juliana’s character.
“We tried to help her mother win back custody through rehabilitation but eventually we had to decide what was best for J,” reflects Noemi. “Through change, transition, and adaptation, she has struggled with trust.
“Because of wrestling, she has gone from not wanting to do anything on her own to becoming a go-getter who is completely independent, totally in charge of her life.”
Perhaps because she grew up with a tenuous hold on life, never knowing what might come next, or when Norma might next be in rehab or just absent, Juliana learned to live in the moment.
Presciently, Juliana sees that as her mother’s unknowing gift to her. “Experiencing what my mom has gone through, I am thankful because I know better what choices to make with my own life.”
“Most of all, wrestling has helped Juliana Cubias overcome emotional and physical hardships that could have destroyed her,” concludes Nick. “It has truly taught her the value of who and what she is. She now knows that through hard work and determination, anything can be overcome.”